"I Am Not I" - "我不再是自己"


I am not I.

I am this one
walking beside me whom I do not see,
whom at times I manage to visit,
and whom at other times I forget;
who remains calm and silent while I talk,
and forgives, gently, when I hate,
who walks where I am not,
who will remain standing when I die.

My painting was inspired by the poem of Juan Ramon Jimenez "I Am Not I", translated by Robert Bly. Please view a better image at: http://fineartamerica.com/featured/i-am-not-i-xueling-zou.html
Storytelling artist Xueling Zou who works in ♦️ watercolor & ♦️ oil mediums on ♦️ original art Plein Air paintings. Ship worldwide since 2010 @ https://about.me/xuelingzou@ about.me/xuelingzou or http://xueling-zou.pixels.com

Original Art Story

Original Art Story - The Colors of La Boca Argentina

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Colorful La Boca grew to become an Italian (mostly from Genoa) district of Buenos Aires, Argentina in a very short time in mid-19th-century. It used to be the area where Italian immigrants arrived, and settled in the poorest of conditions. Their houses were built by the leftover corrugated iron and other waste found in the nearby harbour and industry on the Riachuelo river. In order to make the neighbourhood more interesting, they decided to paint their houses in bright colors by using the leftover paint from boats - hence the many different colours that can be seen. Where first a small river flowed, the area that now is Caminito had tracks installed, and when those were not used anymore, this developed into an ugly, abandoned part of La Boca. There were several museums with paintings portraying its hard-working inhabitants in the shipyards and on the docks. Local artist Quinquela Martín painted the walls of the street, which now we know as Caminito (which means little path in Spanish)...
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Paintings with Auspicious Symbols V - Peacocks 孔雀東南飛

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I was inspired by the Chinese traditional folk art style to create a couple of peacocks with eight peony-flowers oil painting on canvas recently, which I named "Peacocks Flying Southeast 孔雀東南飛". "Peacocks Flying Southeast" is well-known to Chinese and is a phenomenal poem in Chinese literary history. It is one of the collections of the Music Academy (YueFu) formed by the Han Dynasty (196—219 AD) courts to gather literary works created largely for the common people. It was about a tragic love story between a young couple, who promised to love each other forever. Perhaps the morbid mother-in-law could not stand the daughter-in-law coming between her and her son. Eventually she broke up the marriage when her son was working out of the town. The young couple’s dream and promise of living together was shattered. Both their families forced them to marry someone else. So this young couple took their own lives, fulfilling their commitment of love in a different world....
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The Old Man and The Sea - Original Watercolor

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This original watercolor painting was inspired by Ernest Hemingway's The Old Man and The Sea.  It is one of my favorite watercolors, and a great gift for Father's Day. (Please click the image to enlarge) I read this book in Chinese a long time ago, then I read it again in English when I was studying in Australia. Back to my overseas studying time, I had to take the ferries from the place I lived to school each day for a while. Not mention the terrible home sick I had, the ending of relationship with my first boy-friend, when I struggled with every single little detail in life. But nothing could stop my love of the ocean and I enjoyed taking ferries on beautiful and stormy days. Watching the sun-rising or sun-setting, sailing by the magnificent city landscape and the awesome boats out on the sea, I promised myself that I knew I would overcome the difficulties... Years later, I started painting watercolors after moving to Bay Area in California, and the first one in m...
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Short-pose live male model drawings

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Seems that working in the studio and Plein Air outdoors are quite different in many ways. Went to Carmel Plein Air painting with my friends for four days, missed the last session for short-pose live model drawing. So I found that I had difficult time to draw. No matter two minutes, five minutes or ten minutes, I could not draw fast and correctly enough, didn't have time to draw a leg or arm. This model was good, he worked very hard, I saw his body shaking during the pose. Of course we all pay good tips to our models. (May 10 2022)
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Short-pose live male model drawings

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Always look forward to drawing nude models for their short poses. But I felt it was super challenging to draw this one. His body proportions were unique, long and slim. He posed in many twisty positions while standing, I only could try my best, many other artist said that they felt not easy to draw him too. Felt better by knowing I was not the only one that had a hard time. Hahaha... (April 26 2022)
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Work in Progress, live models studies - long and short pose

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Arrived 30 minutes earlier at the studio, because the model is one of my favorites. Our model she is African and Irish mixed. Today she wore a long white silk gown which contrasted her skin, very beautiful. But I didn't get the spot where I wanted to paint. She looked exactly straight to me, and her hands and feet were all together in the middle. Depends on my years of Plein Air experience, I know I must make decision quickly. Almost the same moment she moved her hand to touch her face, I captured the moment, so I could had a reference photo to paint while her two hands were positioned one horizontal, and one vertical. I already had done two portraits of her before, both were 12"x16". Today I worked on a new colored panel 16"x20". During the work, I noticed that her gown was quite challenging to paint, because of the white silky and reflective material. So I just focused on her whole shape, and used my left over color palette. Three hours was too shor...
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Short pose live female model study

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Tonight's drawing class was fully booked.  The model's pose was classical and stable, very professional. I am very sure that she wasn't only my favorite model, everyone likes her.  Changed to use the soft kind charcoals, but they break so easily.  I have to change my habits to draw, usually I draw with my energy, now I have to hold my energy to draw.  So much to learn and practice!  (February 8 2022)
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Happy Mother's Day - The Red Shoes

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This piece won the 1st place in the Contest - Shoes on May 18th, 2012.  This painting was inspired by "The Red Shoes", which was first introduced to me by my mother. To me The Red Shoes has become a symbol of a career woman who has devoted her life to her job, or made some sacrifice in life. I painted this piece with my love for my mother.  Slowly I understand her more and more day after day. Happy Mother's Day! Inside and out Mom and I are so different, only one thing I have in common with her - a fast walk. She is outgoing, can make friends everywhere she goes through a very short conversation, rich or poor, old or young, higly educated person or without any education, even in different cultures, sometimes without language communication... She was beautiful and talented in theater arts, dancing, singing and acting. She was chosen to be an actress in a couple of movies when she was very young. Then she became a principal opera singer (western style) preformed o...
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Plein Air trip @ Carmel by the sea, CA

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Four-day-trip, it wasn't long, especially when we painted at the one of most beautiful places, Point Lobos State Natural Reserve. Three artist friends together, we made progress from May 3 to May 6. It was a nice and clear afternoon when we checked in Hyatt Carmel Highlands - Hyatt Inn.  There was an amazing sunset view overlooking Big Sur Coast from our room every dawn.  Bought enough food from Safe Way.  We cooked and ate branches, and late dinners, went out painting about six hours each day.     Weather was unpredictable, it changes dramatically all the time, from warm sunny to windy foggy in one hour.   First day wasn't easy, didn't know how to handle the fast changes.  Then started to learn and improved...  I did two watercolor paintings, one sketch on the first day. After dinner, one of the artists suggested painted another still life after I arranged our food on the table. Next day, we painted at Garrapata State Park. T...
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A White Peacock - 一只白孔雀

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I remember that my father took me to the Beijing Zoo when I was about five one Sunday morning. There were about 20 peacocks that lived on a bird island with a hundred other birds, like crays, swans, ducks, etc... When we arrived, there were some parents with their children watching birds - especially the peacocks. I was told that the peacocks might open up their feathers when they saw pretty colors. Some parents would dress up their children with colorful clothes, but I only wore in my father's favorite color, sky blue. We both mentioned the same white peacock was our favorite. It seemed that white peacock heard us and turned around facing me, then opened up its feathers immediately. A lot of people clapped their hands for what they saw - the most glorious shining feathers opening up against the morning sunlight - like a Chinese fan. Of course to me as a little girl, it was the most beautiful and precious moment to experience joy with my father when he big and strong hand was holdi...
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