"I Am Not I" - "我不再是自己"


I am not I.

I am this one
walking beside me whom I do not see,
whom at times I manage to visit,
and whom at other times I forget;
who remains calm and silent while I talk,
and forgives, gently, when I hate,
who walks where I am not,
who will remain standing when I die.

My painting was inspired by the poem of Juan Ramon Jimenez "I Am Not I", translated by Robert Bly. Please view a better image at: http://fineartamerica.com/featured/i-am-not-i-xueling-zou.html
Storytelling artist Xueling Zou who works in ♦️ watercolor & ♦️ oil mediums on ♦️ original art Plein Air paintings. Ship worldwide since 2010 @ https://about.me/xuelingzou@ about.me/xuelingzou or http://xueling-zou.pixels.com

Original Art Story

Paintings with Auspicious Symbols V - Peacocks 孔雀東南飛

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I was inspired by the Chinese traditional folk art style to create a couple of peacocks with eight peony-flowers oil painting on canvas recently, which I named "Peacocks Flying Southeast 孔雀東南飛". "Peacocks Flying Southeast" is well-known to Chinese and is a phenomenal poem in Chinese literary history. It is one of the collections of the Music Academy (YueFu) formed by the Han Dynasty (196—219 AD) courts to gather literary works created largely for the common people. It was about a tragic love story between a young couple, who promised to love each other forever. Perhaps the morbid mother-in-law could not stand the daughter-in-law coming between her and her son. Eventually she broke up the marriage when her son was working out of the town. The young couple’s dream and promise of living together was shattered. Both their families forced them to marry someone else. So this young couple took their own lives, fulfilling their commitment of love in a different world....
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Original Art Story - The Colors of La Boca Argentina

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Colorful La Boca grew to become an Italian (mostly from Genoa) district of Buenos Aires, Argentina in a very short time in mid-19th-century. It used to be the area where Italian immigrants arrived, and settled in the poorest of conditions. Their houses were built by the leftover corrugated iron and other waste found in the nearby harbour and industry on the Riachuelo river. In order to make the neighbourhood more interesting, they decided to paint their houses in bright colors by using the leftover paint from boats - hence the many different colours that can be seen. Where first a small river flowed, the area that now is Caminito had tracks installed, and when those were not used anymore, this developed into an ugly, abandoned part of La Boca. There were several museums with paintings portraying its hard-working inhabitants in the shipyards and on the docks. Local artist Quinquela Martín painted the walls of the street, which now we know as Caminito (which means little path in Spanish)...
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Short-pose live male model drawings

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Always look forward to drawing nude models for their short poses. But I felt it was super challenging to draw this one. His body proportions were unique, long and slim. He posed in many twisty positions while standing, I only could try my best, many other artist said that they felt not easy to draw him too. Felt better by knowing I was not the only one that had a hard time. Hahaha... (April 26 2022)
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Short-pose live male model drawings

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Seems that working in the studio and Plein Air outdoors are quite different in many ways. Went to Carmel Plein Air painting with my friends for four days, missed the last session for short-pose live model drawing. So I found that I had difficult time to draw. No matter two minutes, five minutes or ten minutes, I could not draw fast and correctly enough, didn't have time to draw a leg or arm. This model was good, he worked very hard, I saw his body shaking during the pose. Of course we all pay good tips to our models. (May 10 2022)
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The Old Man and The Sea - Original Watercolor

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This original watercolor painting was inspired by Ernest Hemingway's The Old Man and The Sea.  It is one of my favorite watercolors, and a great gift for Father's Day. (Please click the image to enlarge) I read this book in Chinese a long time ago, then I read it again in English when I was studying in Australia. Back to my overseas studying time, I had to take the ferries from the place I lived to school each day for a while. Not mention the terrible home sick I had, the ending of relationship with my first boy-friend, when I struggled with every single little detail in life. But nothing could stop my love of the ocean and I enjoyed taking ferries on beautiful and stormy days. Watching the sun-rising or sun-setting, sailing by the magnificent city landscape and the awesome boats out on the sea, I promised myself that I knew I would overcome the difficulties... Years later, I started painting watercolors after moving to Bay Area in California, and the first one in m...
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Chinese Moon Festival II - A Classical Poem and Homesick 中秋节思乡

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Dream in the Night — Interpreted by Xu YuanChong Abed, I see a silvery light, I wonder if it's frost aground. Looking up, I find the moon bright; Bowing, in homesickness I'm drowned. 静夜思 — 李白 床前明月光， 疑是地上霜。 举头望明月， 低头思故乡。 (Please click the image to enlarge) This poem written by Li Bai (701 – 762) who was a major Chinese poet of the Tang dynasty poetry period  - China's "golden age" of classical Chinese poetry (  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Li_Bai ). It was one of the first classical poems I was taught before my primary school. Of course, I would not know the meaning at that young age. The older I get and the farther I live from home, the deeper I feel this poem, which is more often appearing in my head. Hiding my tears used to be part my character. But now, I can no longer control it behind my eyes whenever I think of it... Another Mid-Autumn Festival is coming again, which is a popular lunar harvest festival celebrated by Chinese...
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Plein Air @ Allied Arts Guild Menlo Park CA

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I have been thinking to paint at this location for a while. Today was perfect weather for outdoor painters, and I went there to paint with other local artists. Such a gorgeous place.  Each time I had a  hard time deciding where to start my work.  I even went upstairs to see the whole garden from above.  Almost every angle was paintable. Actually, I saw a guy who was doing flower arrangment on his knees.  I asked for his permisssion to take photos. he told me that he did this each Wednesday.  I would love to paint him someday in my studio.  Finally, I decided to paint from a similar spot as my first time painting there. Just like many years ago, there was a class of younger age children singing.  Tlhe teacher kept repeating the same song over and over... I thought I could remember the song, but I only remember the "miao miao miao" of the cat... LOL Some artist started earlier, and some of them were fast painters, they started theirs a little bit e...
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The Sound of Silence

There are more than one million visitors that have viewed my art. Have you? @https://about.me/xuelingzou "In solitude the passions feed upon the heart."  - Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton "Art starts alone – and convinces society later." - Douglas Davis Why do I love the old songs so much? Do you? "The Sound of Silence": I first listened to it without knowing enough English words back when I was still in China. It always brings me so many memories, especially during the holiday season. I just love this song, because of the solitude of my life being an artist, and with sensitivity... It takes the courage to be there for sure! Belows are the two links of the song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4zLfCnGVeL4 https://www.facebook.com/maya.huynh?fref=ts Attached the lyrics: Hello darkness, my old friend, I've come to talk with you again, Because a vision softly creeping, Left its seeds while I was sleeping, And the vision that was planted in my br...
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Lady from Bangladesh

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There are many beautiful portraits that have visually showed us the subject's personality, history and culture.  I think facial expression is another very interesting subject in art.  That is why I love to study it.  I do it differently than some artists who just copying a photo.  I'd rather to know a little bit more about my subject before I start painting.  Here are some some portraits I painted and the stories behind them.  Please visit my online gallery at:  http://xueling-zou.artistwebsites.com/galleries.html to see more. Lady from Bangladesh was the portrait I painted in March 2011. We used to be neighbors for a short while. Her name is Tahmina. She was the mother of three very nice and well-educated boys, with such a sweet character. One early morning, I saw her dressed this lovely traditional pink/magenta sari in the garden, the morning light went through her veil, shining on her face... I went back and grabbed my camera imme...
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Plein Air @ Alviso Marina County Park San Jose CA

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It was not a warm morning at the location. I got to one of my favorite painting spots and decided to paint again at this location. Couldn't remember how many times I've painted there before. Still, I started with a thumbnail, almost the same layout from my memory as before. I tried to use less water as it was hard to dry given the weather. One lady walked by me to complement my work, but she she surprised me and immediately apologized and told me that she was just walking by. Later some male voice was even louder behind me saying that it was a beautiful painting. That really scarred me a lot. Turned around and I saw two policemen driving by, they were kind and smiled, apologized as well. Then asked me when I started my work. I didn't really pay much attention, told them around nine o'clock. After they left, I realized that it might not have told them the correct time, they might misunderstand me and think I was not honest enough, oh, no.... Saw several other artis...
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