"I Am Not I" - "我不再是自己"


I am not I.

I am this one
walking beside me whom I do not see,
whom at times I manage to visit,
and whom at other times I forget;
who remains calm and silent while I talk,
and forgives, gently, when I hate,
who walks where I am not,
who will remain standing when I die.

My painting was inspired by the poem of Juan Ramon Jimenez "I Am Not I", translated by Robert Bly. Please view a better image at: http://fineartamerica.com/featured/i-am-not-i-xueling-zou.html
Storytelling artist Xueling Zou who works in ♦️ watercolor & ♦️ oil mediums on ♦️ original art Plein Air paintings. Ship worldwide since 2010 @ https://about.me/xuelingzou@ about.me/xuelingzou or http://xueling-zou.pixels.com

Original Art Story

Original Art Story - The Colors of La Boca Argentina

Image
Colorful La Boca grew to become an Italian (mostly from Genoa) district of Buenos Aires, Argentina in a very short time in mid-19th-century. It used to be the area where Italian immigrants arrived, and settled in the poorest of conditions. Their houses were built by the leftover corrugated iron and other waste found in the nearby harbour and industry on the Riachuelo river. In order to make the neighbourhood more interesting, they decided to paint their houses in bright colors by using the leftover paint from boats - hence the many different colours that can be seen. Where first a small river flowed, the area that now is Caminito had tracks installed, and when those were not used anymore, this developed into an ugly, abandoned part of La Boca. There were several museums with paintings portraying its hard-working inhabitants in the shipyards and on the docks. Local artist Quinquela Martín painted the walls of the street, which now we know as Caminito (which means little path in Spanish)...
Read more

The Old Man and The Sea - Original Watercolor

Image
This original watercolor painting was inspired by Ernest Hemingway's The Old Man and The Sea.  It is one of my favorite watercolors, and a great gift for Father's Day. (Please click the image to enlarge) I read this book in Chinese a long time ago, then I read it again in English when I was studying in Australia. Back to my overseas studying time, I had to take the ferries from the place I lived to school each day for a while. Not mention the terrible home sick I had, the ending of relationship with my first boy-friend, when I struggled with every single little detail in life. But nothing could stop my love of the ocean and I enjoyed taking ferries on beautiful and stormy days. Watching the sun-rising or sun-setting, sailing by the magnificent city landscape and the awesome boats out on the sea, I promised myself that I knew I would overcome the difficulties... Years later, I started painting watercolors after moving to Bay Area in California, and the first one in m...
Read more

Short-pose live male model drawings

Image
Seems that working in the studio and Plein Air outdoors are quite different in many ways. Went to Carmel Plein Air painting with my friends for four days, missed the last session for short-pose live model drawing. So I found that I had difficult time to draw. No matter two minutes, five minutes or ten minutes, I could not draw fast and correctly enough, didn't have time to draw a leg or arm. This model was good, he worked very hard, I saw his body shaking during the pose. Of course we all pay good tips to our models. (May 10 2022)
Read more

Short-pose live male model drawings

Image
Always look forward to drawing nude models for their short poses. But I felt it was super challenging to draw this one. His body proportions were unique, long and slim. He posed in many twisty positions while standing, I only could try my best, many other artist said that they felt not easy to draw him too. Felt better by knowing I was not the only one that had a hard time. Hahaha... (April 26 2022)
Read more

Plein Air @ Carmelite Monastery Santa Clara CA

Image
Painted Plein Air for the first time in a while, I really missed it. Today I went to Carmelite Monastery Santa Clara CA to paint this church building, which has been on my mind for a long time. It was a peaceful place, only saw a few people, including a nun who walked into the church from the side door. Drawing the architecture took me for a while, then painted the clouds with care. Because we don't usually have clouds besides during winter. Not much light and contrast. Then spent a lot of time for the details on the building. After that I realized that the details were too small and there wasn't any reason to include them in my Plein air work. Church bell rang twice during the time I painted there, it brought a lot peace. Hope it expends to the whole world....
Read more

Chinese Moon Festival II - A Classical Poem and Homesick 中秋节思乡

Image
Dream in the Night — Interpreted by Xu YuanChong Abed, I see a silvery light, I wonder if it's frost aground. Looking up, I find the moon bright; Bowing, in homesickness I'm drowned. 静夜思 — 李白 床前明月光， 疑是地上霜。 举头望明月， 低头思故乡。 (Please click the image to enlarge) This poem written by Li Bai (701 – 762) who was a major Chinese poet of the Tang dynasty poetry period  - China's "golden age" of classical Chinese poetry (  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Li_Bai ). It was one of the first classical poems I was taught before my primary school. Of course, I would not know the meaning at that young age. The older I get and the farther I live from home, the deeper I feel this poem, which is more often appearing in my head. Hiding my tears used to be part my character. But now, I can no longer control it behind my eyes whenever I think of it... Another Mid-Autumn Festival is coming again, which is a popular lunar harvest festival celebrated by Chinese...
Read more

Plein Air @ Alviso Marina County Park San Jose CA

Image
It was not a warm morning at the location. I got to one of my favorite painting spots and decided to paint again at this location. Couldn't remember how many times I've painted there before. Still, I started with a thumbnail, almost the same layout from my memory as before. I tried to use less water as it was hard to dry given the weather. One lady walked by me to complement my work, but she she surprised me and immediately apologized and told me that she was just walking by. Later some male voice was even louder behind me saying that it was a beautiful painting. That really scarred me a lot. Turned around and I saw two policemen driving by, they were kind and smiled, apologized as well. Then asked me when I started my work. I didn't really pay much attention, told them around nine o'clock. After they left, I realized that it might not have told them the correct time, they might misunderstand me and think I was not honest enough, oh, no.... Saw several other artis...
Read more

Painting with Auspicious Symbols VI - Sunflowers and Lizards

Image
I would love to introduce some Chinese symbols to my viewers through my paintings. Here is a still life I painted entitled "Sunflowers and Lizard". Lizard (蜥蜴 or 壁虎; ) Lizards tend to be active at night. For that reason the ancients felt that they were symbolic of protection from the hidden things in life. So a lizard is more than an animal it is a symbol of luck and vision. Lizards are also fast on their feet and can escape predators much larger than themselves. Ancestors said and noted these special qualities. Ruyi (如意; rúyì) What this means in Chinese is "as one wishes you wish". A ruyi is a long curved ceremonial sceptre used in Chinese Buddhism that symbolizes power and good fortune in countless Chinese stories. It can take the shape of a lingzhi mushroom, a cloud, a first or other representation that symbolizes power. There are nearly 3000 ruyi that are variously made from valuable materials like gold, silver, iron, bamboo, wood, ivory, coral, rhinoceros ...
Read more

Capitola Plein Air 6th Annual Art Festival 2021

Image
“Creativity takes courage” – Henri Matisse  November 1 - Day 1 I was quite lucky to get an invitation to join the Capitola Plein Air Event, which I always wanted to join, but it didn't fit into my schedule in the past. Felt excited and checked the weather report constantly, but that didn't help to clear the rain. Arrived there in the morning, met the friendly volunteers, and Laurie the event chair, she was very helpful and made each detail super clear to me! Then Al checked in. He knew Capitola quite well, showed me a couple of places that had the great views. So thankful to him! After I drove to Shadowbrook Restaurant, it hadn't opened yet. I thought that I might paint there under the cover of the roof. An elegantly dressed lady told me that I had to call the restaurant manager, etc. So instead I started painting the front of the restaurant from under a tree with my trunk door open in the parking lot. Rain was slowing down a little bit. Another artist came and we met, she ...
Read more

Paintings with Auspicious Symbols V - Peacocks 孔雀東南飛

Image
I was inspired by the Chinese traditional folk art style to create a couple of peacocks with eight peony-flowers oil painting on canvas recently, which I named "Peacocks Flying Southeast 孔雀東南飛". "Peacocks Flying Southeast" is well-known to Chinese and is a phenomenal poem in Chinese literary history. It is one of the collections of the Music Academy (YueFu) formed by the Han Dynasty (196—219 AD) courts to gather literary works created largely for the common people. It was about a tragic love story between a young couple, who promised to love each other forever. Perhaps the morbid mother-in-law could not stand the daughter-in-law coming between her and her son. Eventually she broke up the marriage when her son was working out of the town. The young couple’s dream and promise of living together was shattered. Both their families forced them to marry someone else. So this young couple took their own lives, fulfilling their commitment of love in a different world....
Read more